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Archive for July, 2008

Dear your friendly neighborhood Celebrity Haiku readers:
I am very happy to say “thank you” to all of the new visitors to our humble abode.  When I started this internet-based humor project only three months ago, I dreamed of a snarky utopia where many voices could be heard speaking the flowering language of haiku.  I am [...]

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How many is too many, Benny?

Wandering Affleck—
conflagrant sun punishes
drunken fools now lost.

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Broderick boy bides
’bruptly, burdened by breakfast
burrito belches.

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Do I look sincere yet?

Scientologist
first, then Buddhist—what’s next, Jew?
Pick one and retain!

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Former sex tape star
comes across brand new hobby:
miniature golf.

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Golf has always been
a homoerotic sport—
big cover won’t help.

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Like Romo, you may
submit your manhood when you
parallel Paris.

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Flinging rotten fish—
Career opportunities
one that never knocks.

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Desperate housewife
looking fraught to pitch a cry
for baseball groupies.

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Light the candles, quick!
Burn that burger to the ground—
before she escapes!

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